apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
