Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Just invented taco cereal.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
