that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
