so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize