Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
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