I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
