Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
FUCK WHALES
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
