Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
