She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
