trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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