Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
