you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
