these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
