the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
