He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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