party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
