# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
How does it feel to date your dad?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
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