...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
