i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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