I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
