i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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