It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize
