oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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