We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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