I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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