Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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