I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
