I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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