And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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