last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize