too bad you live with your parents still
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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