He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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