I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
