it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
