is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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