is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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