How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
There's always time for handjobs
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
