I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
