SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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