Sry I called you an 8
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
