I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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