Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
