Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
