yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
