either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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