I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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