He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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