i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
