for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Randomize
