yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
